It started in college when someone pulled me aside and told me these three fateful words: "You're kinda mean."
After that, I vowed to do my best never to let my sarcasm, if taken seriously, offend anyone.
I didn't really force my views on anyone else until I became a deacon at my church and saw the potential damage sarcasm could do, especially when sensitive matters were being discussed at a meeting.
One example: Our worship service broke off from the youth group worship service for a few years because our pastor thought that the college-and-up people needed to come into their identity as adults. Totally legit. At a planning meeting for a joint retreat, a high schooler asked, "So...why do we have separate worship services?" And an older person replied, "Because we don't like you!"
Everyone laughed, and it was fine, but imagine if someone in that room wondered if there were some truth to that statement. How hurtful!
Also, sarcasm sometimes results in really awkward situations. A guy was telling a girl about how he only had one final that semester. The girl's response: "Die. Just die." What do you say to that? Isn't it just better to say "Wow, that's great!" Everyone feels good.
So I think if we get rid of sarcasm that could possibly hurt people, we could save a lot of hurt feelings and awkward moments.
Are you in??
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Do you think sarcasm might be a MD thing? Even people I've met in VA say that I'm really mean.
ReplyDeleteI think sarcasm, used with discretion, can be a good thing, but more often than not, it tends to be really mean spirited. Sarcasm is in heavy rotation in our marriage, but after reading this, I think it might be good, esp. for me to cool it w/ the sarcasm.
after being in australia for 2.5 weeks and then returning back to the states, my sarcasm levels were at an all time high. aussies are *big* teasers! when it comes to sarcasm though, you do need to pick your audience, or break out in a huge grin afterwards so they know you're kidding ;-)
ReplyDeleteSu- I agree. I think sarcasm can help lighten a situation when it's done well and responsibly.
ReplyDeleteNat- That smile afterwards is so important! Otherwise, how are we supposed to know? When I used to be really sarcastic, especially when chatting online, I used to write "(s)" afterwards. :)
someone told u u were mean??? but ur so nice!
ReplyDelete